Perspective

There comes a time in everyone's existence when the curtains of life are drawn open, far past our own peripheral view, and we catch a glimpse of the world that would otherwise go unnoticed... Perhaps we are too busy with what is in front of us to pay attention to what's left behind, or the shades of gray illuminating from the direction of things not-quite-within-our-reach are just not interesting enough for us to stop and dedicate a few moments to. As the years fly by and we continue to walk our own path in life, it is not uncommon for us to strengthen our identities, convictions, and values. What we don't seem to have a grasp on, however, is perspective.

Or maybe it's just me....

I can honestly say that, in my 33 years, yesterday would be the first time I was truly challenged to shift my perspective into high-gear, because clearly it has a lot of catching up to do.... I spent most of the day serving as a judge for the Miss Teen Portland pageant, something I would normally run the other way from (can you say LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE???). I agreed to participate, however, because the premise behind the pageant is that 'it is what is on the inside that counts'... The pageant organizers wanted their judging panel to reflect the belief that shape/size/color/aesthetics are secondary to confidence, poise and humility. Being an advocate of the plus-size community, and parent to a young girl who, like her Amazon mother, will fall outside the realm of 'normal sized', I felt my presence was needed. I was confident I would be able to look beyond the physical and focus on personality. Absolutely positive I would not let a pretty smile sway me into a padded score. I would make the perfect judge....

Until I started meeting and asking questions to the 13-15 year old contestants....

Paris Hilton? Role Model? You have GOT to be kidding me........ (how soon we forget our days of lace gloves and 50 bangles, grinding out a dance/playfully singing the words to "Like A Virgin" *when we were, in fact, still virgins*)...

Jet black hair with a lip/eyebrow piercing? At 14? Whereisyourmother!?! (she is probably in the room outside, supporting and loving you, in spite of your rebellious ways - the same way our own mothers bragged about us - showing off our school pictures, with electric blue eye shadow and our hair being supported by an entire bottle of Rave hairspray, pulled to one side)...

Your favorite singer is Hannah Montana? - hmmm, isn't she a little old to be listening to tween music??? (mind you, I still have my 7" Jordan Knight button from a New Kids on the Block concert I went to at age (yikes!) 15)...

~or~

Marilyn Manson? The self-proclaimed Anti-Christ. nice... (I've got 3 words for you: Nine Inch Nails)... Ok - 3 more. 80s Hair Bands...

Perhaps the highlight of my day's personal journey, however, is when I asked a contestant what her favorite type of music was, and she replied saying she likes the oldies... Her definition of the oldies? BON JOVI.

Wow.

WOW...

I entered the room on Day 1 with confidence, clarity, and the belief that I could help make a difference in the lives of these young women. I left feeling like my mother.... When did I get so old? (this is the first time I realized that I am at an age where I could have given birth to any of these young women)... Am I really that out-of-touch with this particular generation, where my perspective interferes with their own rites-of-passage? Have I forgotten what it was like to be a teenager wanting to "find myself"? Have I really taken the leap from a time and place where I valued and encouraged individual expression, to where I pass down judgement? Is Bon Jovi really considered to be "oldies"????